weeee~~
i'm goin off~~~
but not to go home and slack....leaving office soon to go collect some stuff frm a client..hahaha~
hope i wont get lost, tat area seems totally unfamiliar to me....

boss asked me to go try out the 'ba kut teh' somewhere ard the area i'm goin..says it SUPER famous, and the best time to eat is ard 6.30-7.30pm~~ (he really dun behaves like a boss sometimes~!! xDDD)

anyways~
juz gonna slack off for few more min~~ ^^

...
i dreamt tat i was eating sweets and candies none stop... ...=.=
WTH!?!?!!?
since when did i like to eat sweet stuff tat much??  best part was, when i woke up, i tot i really had a candy inside my mouth...damn u dreams which felt soooo real!!!

anyways~ gotta get to work le~~
still have tonnes of stuff to complete by end of this mth!! oh wait, TODAY IS THE 2nd LAS DAY OF THE MTH!!!!
ok, no blogging for me tml, other than juz posting pic, no words!!! i type very slow, so the time i take to blog is about twice the time compared to other ppl~~
bye~~~~

CAMWHORE PIC FOR THE DAY~~~
(SORRY FOR THE CAPS, HAVE TO USE THEM FOR MY WORK, AND I'M LAZY TO TURN IT OFF~~ XDDDDD)





cute bear bear face ring!!!!! made it myself~~ ^^







我以后统统不管了！

sigh~
go dating must show off??
pfft~

childish much..idoitic much..

weeee~~
today on leave again~!!!

cuz ppl frm philip finally wanna come look at the sound bar le~~
and since my bro and mom cant take leave, so i became the one who's gonna take leave and stay home wait for them~~
and, since philip ppl are coming in the early afternoon, i came back office early in the morning to do some stuff, and, gotta go~

dun wan those ppl to have excuess saying they went my house but there was no one ard...=.=
BYE~!!

troll yeah~

wee~~

yea, i'm bored, so i've decided to post camwhore pics instead~ xDDDD

both sleeves up!!!!!
and i'm trying to keep it as raw as possible, so as to enable multiple styles of wearing it~~ ^^

hmmmmm
he still haven't talk to me juz now.. ..mayb he dun bother to read my blog anymore..
BUT! i sms him tat the door changed password already, he didn;t even reply me a 'noted' or 'ok'... ... ...

mayb i should continue bombard myself wif how irritating he is, his flaws.. . ...hmmm....or even better yet, i need something to keep my mine off him~
YESH!! things other than work~~ ^^ but.. .. ...i still see him every wkday in the office...=.=
oh well~ i can get through somehow~~
juz keep telling myself he's not worth my time, yesh, find other ppl who are worthy of my time now~~
wad's past is past, he may be super caring and sweet in the past, but ya, past is past...

making in progress!!!!!
the other sleeves not up yet, Obi belt not done yet, and some details not in yet as well.....

AND this is only the top, i wonder if i'll have enough time/cloth to finish the pants as well?? hmmmmmm

drop collar at the back~~ ^^
(wad's a kimono/yukata inspired design w/o the awsome drop collar?? xDDD)

note how tat guy changes when i say it's either he return or he wont return the $$
he has used the same old trick far too many time, when he say he'll return, will try to return, i gave him chance and time, end result, not even a single cent back..

so this time round, i'm gonna stand firm on my ground, and my guess is tat high chance he's up the the same old trick again..

since the Sg Police Force refuse to help me pursue the matter, (reason being the amount stolen was $1040 ONLY for them), i've to find some other ways to get my $$ back...

my fren's boss made a report on her sotlen patty cash, amount was also over 1000 but below 2000, and guess wad, it has been almost 1 yr or more, she's still pursuing the matter, as the police haven't even printed out a report for her...=.=

times like this, i hate sg to the core...the gov, it seems the ppl means nothing at all if they can't give them much things in return....zzzzzz

kinda wanna say "i'm sorry"

kinda wanna ask y is he so pissed off at me?

kinda wanna talk to him..

kinda wondering if he'll read this??

ps: if u are reading this, pls tell me y are u so angry at me..unless u really want nothing at all to do wif me..

STONE LIKE A ROCK STAR!!!!!!!

*stone*
... ... ... ... ...

hmmm..oh ya, i remembered!!! i've to go the other office make calls now....zzzzz
damn bored lah~ =.=

bday comming in like 2 weeks time..frens have been asking if i have any plans for my bday...
frankly speaking, i dunno.....might have shoot on the day itself, and might be goin to have some shanghai food for supper with owner and cat partner~~
and think boss is planning to bring me go eat, dunno is it b4 or after, and my only wish is, that baka will go too!!! yea, even though he's still not talkng to me, i still wan him to go, i dun even noe y!! it's like, there might be some awkward feeling if he go, but if he dun, i'll not be happy....=.=

sigh~

zzzzzzzz

WTF!!!!!! omg lah.....last nite dreamt of him again.....zzzzzzzzz
how many times does he have to come into my dreams?!?

sigh~
1st thing in the morning woke up, spend few min figuring out if it's really juz a deam~

heaven's gate wont open

neither will the path to hell show
noone's waiting with their arms open

i can only wait for this desert to snow

gods are watching, angels are listening

so are satans and devils

but all they do is just to enjoy the show

they watch us just as we watch our actors act

people see, people hear

but do anyone knows what is it that they see or hear

or are they just like everything else

where everything around is just an interactive movie

they are the main character and nothing else matters

if so, than i must be the passerby in every movie

never mattered, never stayed

never would anyone even noticed

even if i were to disappear one fine day

noone would notice, noone would care
noone would bother cuz noone knows

i shall fade into the world which has quietly waited

for me to return to it's embrace once more

where no masks are needed

no hypocritsy requried

there i shall be

returning to the state which i should've been

to the place of all beginning

this is something i wrote quite sometime back..forgotten when, but ya..i miss writting...writing emo stuff, writting my feelings out....it seems i've been busy till i've only been ranting none stop!!

anyways~
juz done cleaning up the office~~ gonna change the bedsheets when i get home~ so everything is new~~
than those stupid virus can stop bugging me, than i can focus~!! ^^

dec coming soon.. .. ..sigh.....
now i wanna hide one corner emo, but it seems many ppl planning something up in their sleaves...
juz hope it's a gd one and i dun end up letting ppl down by suddenly emo-ing..

また、お前か猫じゃらし！byカオリン"

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! KAWAIIIII~~~~~~~~

meow!!!!
i juz spoke to tokiwa-san!!!!!
WAAAAAAAA~~~~

lols~
he's my boss's client, heheheeee~~ a japanese!!!!!! damn~ should've study hard when tat prev desktop haven't spoilt, the japanese software inside!!!!

nya~~~ gonna call eiji-san later~~
still wondering it is ei-ji, or ei-ni...=.=

how great it would be if only i didn't noticed tat i liked him...than everything would be as normal...and we would still remain as frens (i guess)...simply hate myself....always liking someone who treats me juz as a fren....and always ends up.. ..like this....sigh~

is it sooo hard for him to talk to me 1st??
a fren asked me, do i still treasure the friendship between me and him, guess wad, told him if i dun, y would i be complaining about this and tat??
my style is simple, ppl wanna have cold war wif me, i can ignore them for the rest of my life for all i care~ i won't bother to notice wth tat person is doining or wadsoeva..
but i told tat fren as well, it's not up to me, for he's the one wanting to cut all ties wif me now, not me..than my fren asked, how do i know tat's true? it could all be my assumptions only...well, i agree wif tat as well..but the way i am now, how to confront sia?? i'm at my weakest rite now...if he were to like ask me "are u feeling better?" or something like tat, i'll more or less try to make things back to normal again...
and here comes another group of frens who simply tells me to forget about him..there're many other guys out there, many other ppl for me to make frens wif, y bother wif someone who dun treasure me... =.=

sigh~
tat's y i hate humans....so freaking hard to know wad's on their mind!!!!!

Ryuichi Sakamoto - Chinsagu No Hana

i like~~ ^^

how can someone be so kinda and sweet, become a coldhearted idiot now??
sigh~

i should go for some checkup real soon, head hurts, dizzy, no appitite, breathlessness....but doc says i'm fine...=.=
mayb there's something wrong wif my heart and brain itself, since BP and lung seems fine to doc

Ryuichi Sakamoto - Solitude

Ryuichi Sakamoto - Merry Christmas Mr.Lawrencce (Live at NYC)

a fren recomended this to me juz now~
it's nice!!!!!!!!
omg, i loved this song for very very long, but didn't know the title!!!

new updates!!

我真的病得不轻啊！！！！

讨厌啦，又病到会发斗和没力气。就连把手抬高一点的力气都没了。 。 。=-=
真是要命喔！！到了晚上，累了却又睡不下。。。一早起来又什没都不想做。。。

【初音ミク】 夜色、ひとひら 【オリジナル曲】

【初音ミク】雨色花火【ベルPオリジナル】

brain is still not working!!!
....and tml my boss gonna test me on new stuff...=.=
golden brain my foot!! if i've golden brain, than all other ppl out there have diamond and platinium brain already~

the only equal thing about my brain is not tat i use all parts equally, should be all parts of my brain are equally dead~

seems like he's sick as well..been hearing him coughing since juz now..
hmmm..

... ... ...ignore... ... ... ...

omg~
so cold, i'm shivering!!!!
(should be due to the cold, or the fact tat i'm hungry BUT dun feel like eating, the flu should come in last..)

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~~~~~~~

dun feel like working lah!!!

病到没力气！！！！！！！！！
讨厌啦~~ 没人可以让我撒娇，变得越病越糟了啦！！！！

WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
today's my boss's bday!!!! wanted to sms him wishing him happy bday..but...can't bring myself to send it out...=.=
sigh~ kinda feels weird bah...and compare to the sms bday wish, think he would wan me to produce more results, Which, is kinda impossible now.... ... ...cuz i'm sick, meds not working, and bodyclock suddenly switched to being nocternal, every morning i feel DAMN SICK (noseblock, breathlessness, dizzy, dry cough, etc etc)

if, there's a guy fren whom i dun dislike, come and treat me real nice and sweet now, think i'm gonna be gone case again....so, kinda trying to be alone till i recover..not gonna hang out wif tat many ppl...owner and meow diff story~ cuz it's not gonna ever b possible for me to like my owner~~ lalalalalalalalalalaaa~~

i'm a sucker for kindness, more so when i'm like this (when the flu virus attacks even my brain i guess)..

[VOCALOID] Tsumugiuta - Hatsune Miku [Append Dark]

 how i normally look like when i work

this is how i look for AFA on the 12 Nov 2011

this, is my sick and cmi face today...

totally no mood to work, feeling like i've drifted through the day..didn't get much things done at all..

and think my boss was more surprised by me asking "blake leh?"

lols..

sigh~

i do not show my weakness openly doesn't mean i'm a strong person..but more often than not...when faced wif a choice, ppl will chose to hurt me, leave me, instead of the other person..reason being i'm strong, i'll get by, but the other person needs them more than i do. . .well, tat's my life, tat's my fate..

when i'm sick, i tend to like to fawn more than usual...but..i do not have anyone to fawn to, meaning i'll have to suck it up, bare wif the worsening condition, till it finally gets better...

i was feeling kinda bad, and kinda thinking of mayb finding some time to talk things out...
end up he even removed me frm his fb.. .. ...does this means he wanna be a total strangers wif me??
or is it tat the ' he already have a gf ' thing is for real and he didn't wan me to spoil his r/s wif tt gal, so he chose to remove me frm his fb, to prevent me frm bugging him???

juz when i tot i actually still have some feelings.. .. ...(and i'm wondering y the hell was i so hush on him)
sigh~
time to move on bah....since i guess he had made himself loud and clear, HE DO NOT WANT ANYTHING TO DO WIF ME, mgs recv...

i'm wondering if i should take MC tml. . .very very very tired.....
damn......

camwhoring wif my POCKY~~~~

weeeeeee~~~
watching Hakuouki now~~~ ^^
heheheee~~~ xDDDD

ARGH!!!!
wad's worst?
not knowing wad to cos for AFA, or knowing tat it clashes wif at least 2 other exhibition (meaning lesser place to slack and ALOT more ppl gonna flood tat area, and suntec city ain't tat huge ya noe)

prepare to COSFUCK!!!!

sigh~
y my fren never do anything, ppl can charge him, and tat asshole who stole my atm, i can't do anything, cuz police chose to believe tat he's my bf...=.=
zzzzzzzzzzzz

me, in the office today~

gonna cut everything short

cuz, brain is dead

 this is me, yesterday~

hmmmm...

think i'm looking worst as days goes by

and i'm suppose to look gd on BOTH sat and sun

how am i suppose to cosplay my uke boi??
when i'm looking more like a zombie,

or more like my sleep deprived seme partner...

muahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa!!!
this is how i look like today!!!! (becomeing panda really soon if it's really my insomia tat came back) and, i make it looked like it's almost winter~~~ lalalaalalalalalalalalaaaa~~

sigh~ i wan my phone back!!!! i wanna camwhore wif my new wig!!!!!
even though it looked not much diff frm my own hair (it's brown, and short, like guy's style) BUT I JUZ WANNA CAMWORE WIF IT!!!!

i'm not sure if it's my bad habbit coming back, or is it insomia tat has came back....
aniways...suppose to be working (as usual on a wkday), but my brain is not functioning. . .i'm lagging even at the most simple tasks, and, dunno, think might be tat i've not enough rest for like the past week, and even worst so for past 3 days. . .

well. . .still gotta work ya?

pfft..

she had juz crossed the line she shouldn't have!!!! sms me when it's few min to 10pm, (and i've already left the office), asking me to check something using the access, and demanding i call a client of her RIGHT AWAY!!! i mean come on, imagine ur agent's assistant called u at 10pm, asking u for payment... ...like wad the fuck right?

sigh...
bad habits coming back if things were to continue at this rate...i'm already close to making myself not sleep at alll, mayb later is i'll starve myself or binge on food, and last stage, is tat i'll stone while doing things i dun even noe i'm doing. . .sooner or later, the S&M me is gonna come back to haunt me down..

hmmmmmmm....

a fren came back frm aussie and was online this morning..so, i send him "yo~ welcome back!!"
and he asked which yiling am i.... ....=.=
asked if i'm his mei mei (meaning younger sis) told him i'm kay, even spell my fb name out!!!
and guess wad....his reply was "oh! my pretty gal!!" . . .

why do guys like to say things they dun mean?? such an insult to be called pretty when the fact is tat u're ugly as hell.....=.=

^^
halloween's photos i have in my phone all uploaded to fb!!!!!! weeee~~~
but it's only like 10-20% of everything.. ... ..the rest of the photos wif my frens!!!!!!! hope they upload soon.....

anyways~ AFA is juz 8 days away!!!!! AND I HAVEN"T EVEN GOT ANYTHNG READY AT ALL!!!!!
omg, i go bang wall die better....................

ok bye~~~
gonna go hunt for many many stuff on sat~~ ^^

sigh~
WTF!!!!!!! early in the morning my email flooded!!!!!
fuck lah, ppl dun wanna let u noe wad they work as cannot is it?? it's NOT a Must to write tat down anyways...
........sb no mood for anything le......=.=

i'm like goin through pre-mental-burnout signs and syndroms!!!!
like i'm always tired, sleepy, not able to focus..dizzy spells, exteremly dry eyes, bad breakouts etc etc.. .. ...

and it would seems tat the monster in me has been growing stronger wif each passing day.. .. ..
it's yet another period of confusion and chaos of the mind..
the need, the urge, to have someone here beside me, someone to fawn to, someone to simply be there for me and me alone....yes i'm a selfish princess, i'm not suppose to be independent, not suppose to live all on my own, yet, i'm doin so..y? law of survival in the real world, even if u're not born tat way, u HAVE to be..

a selfish princess, who has been made to live like juz any other person, to be someone other then who she was born to be, will never see the day her fated prince come for her. . .

lols~

suppose to go ikea to look ard hunting for stuff we might need for dec, and to note the price. . ....ended up in ang mo kio the whole day....
well~ it juz means tat i'll have to go ard hunting for furnitures on my own during the wkend i guess~