game? i'm not interested~~ ^^

yep~~
if liking someone, and being in a relationship is nothing but a game to anyone, i'm sorry, can u get lost???

yep~~ i'm totally not interested in flings and games, say i'm not sporting enough, say i'm not game enough, i dun care....

even if i once had a crush on u, tat's all in the past now~~ ^^
after the viet guy incident, i've once again learnt NOT to trust my heart, thus, even wif a crush, i kinda able to logically analyses and very soon after, crush no more!!!

and having someone tell me they like me is like "ok, thx..and??" kinda thing now....
having toooooooooooo many guys liking me for all the wrong reasons....guess wad? tat's not called like, tat's "LUST"...

if i'm the same me, BUT w/o the Double D, would u still like me the same~?
pls, i'm kind, i'm sweet, if u like me for those reasons only, i'm not the gal for u...

like me even when i'm being mean and cranky, only than, u're worthy of my sweet and gentle side~

There has been a situation!!!
A guy whom a gal used to have a crush on, told her tat if nobody wants her he'll be her bf....
The problem here is, she have finally managed to convince herself to believe that he'll never like her as more than a fren...and suddenly this happens....

Not knowing how or wad to do, she decided to take it is juz a joke...but then again, the guy told her after tat at nothing he said was meant to be a joke...so, basically the gal is stuck not knowing was to do, or even was to believe..and ended up she doesn't know how to even talk to tat guy anymore, cuz well, she still likes him..
And now, she is made to believe tat she has made him angry cuz she said she'll take tat as a joke...

i'm falling really sick AGAIN!!!!!!
think i had a high fever lastnite, cuz i was mweeping and moaning so loud till i woke myself up ard 3am......and after tat, it's on and off, not much sleep....

no body's aching all over, feeling really unwell, yet, i'm in the office..cuz i see no point seeing a doc when i already have the meds, and somemore, i dun wanna be spending too much on doc for these few mths....

22 more days to my shoot....hope i'll recover by then...

Planning FAILED

Yea...I totally failed in planning for today's shoot...end up, TOTAL FAILURE!!!!!
Not only I made the three if them hike the muddy path, which some fall over few times, we end up not having any shoot at all...at least Arella have quite a few photos taken....
And I manage to sprain my ankle, which, I can only say serve me right..

My only photos are camwhore pic frm my phone, which, it's also a lot lesser than usual camwhore session...for totally no mood...

I tried, I did, but sometimes somethings trying juz ain't enough

Sigh...yea, I tried to be normal, tried to be more of a social person..tried to be less angry, tried to love, tried to forget, tried to live life as supposed to be....

Tried to love, and failed badly, for it isn't in my nature to do so, which made me not know how to love...and I end up pushing those ppl even further away frm me...
Tried to be normal...but juz as a crazy person can never fully be normal, I can't either...when I'm ill, when I get too pissed off as something, I tend to revisit old ways...be it force vomit, or scratch till I almost tear my skin, till it almost bleed, or simply starve myself for no reason other than bcuz I'm angry...
And even though knowing I HAVE to talk to someone, but it seems I have no one I talk to....they are juz kids, who have their own troubles, and haven't even been through even half of was I had, so to talk to them about these is like talking einstein since to Adam and eve...they would not understand 90% of was I'm saying, and such topics are boring to even listen to...

So, I can only write it out here....
I wouldn't even post such thing here, unless I have to....and I'm doin so now is bcuz I feel like if I dun let some of the things out, i'll end up scaring myself again....and currently, there is nothing or me to hold on to, not even false hopes...

ok, since my blog has been kinda dead, here's some photos~~
those by alan were taken sometime back, those Midnight shoot ones were taken on 5 May 2012, or 6 May 2012 super early...started shooting ard 11pm on the 5th, ended shoot at 6am on the 6th~~

shoot at a bridge at Fort Siloso, Sentosa
photo by Alan

Pool test shoot at TBC, Sentosa
photo by Alan

midnight shoot at NYC bus, Somerset
photo by Foo Yoong Yih

midnight shoot at NYC bus, Somerset
photo by Foo Yoong Yih

midnight shoot at NYC bus, Somerset
photo by Foo Yoong Yih

midnight shoot at NYC bus, Somerset
photo by Foo Yoong Yih

midnight shoot at ION, Orchard
photo by Foo Yoong Yih