updates updates..

soooooo long never update my blog..but lucky no need to say sorry to anyone cuz zero views for tat period of time..;p

dunno y but juz seem to be wanting more rest recently..think cuz wasn't feeling well..it's like so freaky that i puke again juz 2days ago..but nothing but gas and acid came out..but thank goodness it's so much better now..(tat's y got energy to blog today..;p)

hmmmmmmmm........... ........like nothing much to date oso..except the pink goblins running ard are now gone..only tat the clouds still looks quite tasty sometimes..

can't belive i manage to survive work (which was quite busy for the past few days) w/o messing thing up too much, with my brain being stuck..(someone even told me i look like i'm on drugs as i was stoning way too much...-.-)

HAHAHAHAH..mon off day..wonder if gonna go out wif anyone..;p
it's like suddenly dun like to be alone on my off days..which is not vry gd cuz normally tat's how i've to spend my off..anyways..gonna go off to work soon...
ja mata~ =3

hyper hyper~

last nite i went into hyper mode again..both hyper neko & hyper inu mode..;p
can't even stand still for 1min..but at least no runway walk in stereo last nite.....ok..mayb there was..but only a little tiny bitsy..XD
was being called into manager's office halfway..(!?)
and i tot it has something to do wif my over-active-ness..(haha..;p) but turn out to be something very gd..^^
it was regarding my confirmation in the company..and yes..i'm about to become a confirmed staff of stereo..BANZAI~! BANZAI~!
after coming out frm the office..totally went puppy mode (thank god for LOUD music in clubs, esp mine..;p)..some might have noticed (which i truely hope it's noone) tahat i was making all these weird noises, as if i was howling or something..which was wad i was doing actually, howling that is..dunno why, dunno when it started (frm wad i heard frm my mom, i was like this since i was very young) but sometimes i would juz start making all these sounds of cat or dogs..and one can actually tell my mood frm it if they heard it..which i try not to let anyone hear it ofcuz..
cuz though it's a known fact that i'm crazy, or juz not that normal for a normal person..or a pretty sane and normal person for a abnormal person..(?????)
*sigh*...brain not functioning well today..so i could only hope that i can get pass my day at work later w/o messing things up..;p
will update blog soon when my brain decided to wake frmthe dead..got so much so much to say..
but my brain is stuck somewhere where the goblins are pink and the skys are candy floss...=3

shaiya online..!!!!!!!!!!!! & kendo..=3

haha..started playing shaiya online on sunday (or should say monday morning ;p)..even though i've seen my cousin, neo, playing it like forever, now i'm still kinda lost..i dun even noe how to open the chat thingy..it sometimes pops up by itself (as i seriuosly dunno wad i did)..><
and i haven't played for 24h yet i've alreadi died twice..!!!!!!
*sigh* talk about noob..-,-

WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....
tue one more off day to go..than it's work & work till my next off..^^
suppose to meet lao san on tue, hopefully get to meet her this time..it's like sooooooo long since we last met..!!!!

oh ya..i started practicing Kendo on my own..and seriously..the footwork are alrite When Done On It's Own..but when i tried doing it with the bokken (wooden sword) it's a totally diff story..and i totally underestimated the action of swinging the sword..it's super diff frm swinging an anything else you can find in your house..but it was fun..trying to practice it while avoiding the ceiling fan and trying not to hit the ceiling or wall when swinging the sword..
can't wait till i get the han of it than i can move on to swinging a real katana..^^

went crazy @ work..;p

haha..wasn't very busy towards closing time..and for some reasons, i was being SUPER HYPER..!!!!! juz can't stand still for even a minute..so i've been walking ard, here and there quite alot..and before anyone knew it (including myself), i was jumping up and down, doing silly cay-walks, and dancing allover the place..even when the boss is sitting there..yes, i was still dancing..but not that much..;p
everyone was very much surprised as much as they were amused (i guess) when seeing me behaving the way i did..many thought i was crazy..and i did drive someone crazy with my hyper activeness..=3 to the extand that she has to address her concerns to the manager..*.*
but he was ok with it, lucky for me..;p but than i felt quite bad too..cuz while jumping ard like a tied-up lunatic in IMH, i didn't notice that my manager was behind me..(so.!?)
i ended up stepping on his foot..or rather..landed on his foot..
end of the day he was still ok with it..^^

i'm soooooo lucky to have a manager like H..:3

day off wif my mom..

*juz a few updates b4 posting anything..;p - bought 2 baby on tue..a bamboo "practice" sword and a black boken (wooden sword) and alreadi named them..boken's called tama while the practice sword's called katsuki..=3
and few days ago (think it was fri nite) i was so disappointed and totally lost control..resulting in a very unwanted situation..which was i teared in front of H..and i was so unstable that he had to send me for a 15min break even though i juz got back frm my eating break..:(
tat's all for updates..now let's move on to the post..*
sunday, 11oct, was my off day and it so happens to be my mom's off day as well..actually wanted to go have buffet @ pariss international..but i can't wake up in time so ended up eating @ pizza hut..not bad la..at least still better than juz eating coffee shop again..;p
actually wanted to dropby my workplace for some snacks and food..but can't..so went to check out zirca's "boy nite" wif my mom..YES..u didn't read it wrong..i went club wif my mom..but we went to SENOR TOPAZ juz ard tat area for a bite 1st..and the food there was goooood..very maxico and ppl there are very warm and very fun ppl..u'll not regret eating there for sure even if u dun really like maxico food..for u'll enjoy watching how the ppl there enjoy themselves and dancing like nobody's business..they're juz cute lah..;p
it was really quite packed in there..so than i've seen for myself that ppl @ my workplace says that most of the boys went zirca instead..but i oso noticed something as well..those boys there aren't as fun as hose who comes to my workplace and butter..
those boys there are juz.. ...hmmm...dunno how to put it in words..they dun smile to anyone else and juz aren't gay enough..
and for those of u who have been thinking who would be so crazy to b clubbing wif their mothers..i would say i'll b even mor crazy if i would have went clubing ALONE in my recent condition..dunno how wild i would get and wad trouble would be in if i didn't have someone there..someone whom u'll surelly behave yourselves when he/she is ard..
well guess that's all for now..
juz one more thing..juz found out i'm actually really mentally ill..Borderline Personality Disorder..
and some website actually says it's a often overlooked serious condition..hmmm...
even if it is something even more serious than BPD i dun think i wanna get it cured anyway..
their tearm for my multi personalities thingy was "inter-relationship" thingy..and i don't get the "self image" part..if geting a cure means becoming 1 whole person than they might as well kill me..how am i to survive w/o my other selfs..???

think i will be needing a doc soon..

has been really unstable recently..and my multiple personalities seems to have isolate themselves a little as it seems that they no longer share everything everytime..
feels like depression is coming back..but it's not like in the past where by i can juz be emo whole day for few mths..i've got to work, and those who knows about my past (which is only very few)believed that i've recover frm it all already..maybe i'm a little crazy now but no longer depressed..
and they are the ones who really care and will worry if anything happens..so for their sake..i hope i manage to hold everything inside..after these few years of "training", think my smile is more or less gd enough to hide most of the things..can't worry them anymore than wad i've made them gone through in the past..at most i will juz have to go find a doc in secret..anyone who's starting to get worried reading this..don't worry..at least i'm not suicidal now..yes i do wanna disappear frm the surface of earth..and at most thats wad i'll do..wad gd is killing myself as my body still remains even when i'm dead..

~神様、私の魂保護するどうぞ~

went butter & living rm again....=3

Hahahahahaha..IT'S MAX'S BIRTHDAY..!!!!!!!!!

but he off mon & tue so only way is to celebrate it on sunday nite..(even though should be mon morning since it's after midnite alreadi..;p)

haha..he was the poor lucky bday boy..lucky as in lots of ppl celebrate his bday for him/with him..poor guy as in he was forced to drink quite alot lah..but that's how they have fun..;p

i had loads of fun too..with my cat ear hoodie and my super long tail..XD
(even though i annoyed quite afew ppl with it..;p)
AHAHHAHAHAHAHAhahahahaha...but it was fun nevertheless..=p

in the end i manage to be back but still feeling alittle emo..like everything's not gonna go well for the week ends..like i'm gonna be abandon again somehow..juz feels so lonely suddenly somehow..am i back on depression..???
i really don't know...can't afford to go back there noe that i've started working..and for the 1st time..i'm allowed to be the one to be workin..!!! not some other personalities inside..even though i'm also juz another one of the many personalities inside..but it seems i was created to mingle around with people or to be protected by others..even if i say so..it seems that so far i'm only able to surface only around very very few people..wonder if anyone actually noticed that the 'kay' they know seems alittle strange, as if a total different person sometimes..
or maybe cuz normally it would be the standard few to be around those people that's why noone can tell..but it's not funny when the only person who's the bright and cheerful one has now become a depressed emo who juz wanna disappear somewhere..

~ 神様、私の魂保護するどうぞ ~ hope the cheerful cat will be back soon.. ...for the sake of everyone..for i do not wish to affect anyone with my depressing aura.....