in the end i manage to be back but still feeling alittle emo..like everything's not gonna go well for the week ends..like i'm gonna be abandon again somehow..juz feels so lonely suddenly somehow..am i back on depression..???
i really don't know...can't afford to go back there noe that i've started working..and for the 1st time..i'm allowed to be the one to be workin..!!! not some other personalities inside..even though i'm also juz another one of the many personalities inside..but it seems i was created to mingle around with people or to be protected by others..even if i say so..it seems that so far i'm only able to surface only around very very few people..wonder if anyone actually noticed that the 'kay' they know seems alittle strange, as if a total different person sometimes..
or maybe cuz normally it would be the standard few to be around those people that's why noone can tell..but it's not funny when the only person who's the bright and cheerful one has now become a depressed emo who juz wanna disappear somewhere..

~ 神様、私の魂保護するどうぞ ~ hope the cheerful cat will be back soon.. ...for the sake of everyone..for i do not wish to affect anyone with my depressing aura.....